Friends! Who Needs Them? (Pt. 2)

So, I left off in Pt. 1 about finding the need, but still needing the want and the why. I began to study what the Bible says about friendships, and I really got an eye-opener. Man, Ecclesiastes 4:12 is where it’s at! “You are better off to have a friend than to be all alone, because then you will get more enjoyment out of what you earn. If you fall, your friend can help you up. But if you fall without having a friend nearby, you are really in trouble. If you sleep alone, you won't have anyone to keep you warm on a cold night. Someone might be able to beat up one of you, but not both of you. As the saying goes, ‘A rope made from three strands of cord is hard to break'." (CEV)

Wow, I don’t know about you, but I grew up thinking the three strands of cord was for married couples only and represented the inclusion of Christ into your relationship. But when read in the context of the other Scriptures, it is talking about FRIENDS!!! Did you know that if you take a triple braided cord and pull on the bottom of one of the strands, the other two will tighten or bond together? I’m just gonna let you ponder that for a second.

That passage showed my WHY we NEED friends and, in turn, created the WANT. In chapter 3, it talks about all the different seasons and how they are fleeting. Solomon, the assumed author, declares in a matter of words that life can feel meaningless unless you have God and FRIENDS. Of course we know that HE will never leave us or forsake us, but it is just as important to note the importance of finding a friend who won’t either. And in looking back at Proverbs 18:24, it is definitely a possibility!

But in order to find, you first have to seek. That’s the challenge, but the benefits are worth it…which I probably would have not said a year ago. As I venture through this unfamiliar territory, I am finding that the terrain becomes less and less treacherous. The road gets smoother and my trust grows deeper. I love the transformation that has taken place and watching it re-develop into a natural desire that I have missed for so long.

When I take the kids to school in the morning, we have always prayed that God would help us to be good friends and make good friends. Ideally, you should be the friend that you want to have. That’s what I have been focusing on lately. No matter how busy I am, I can always find time to take a call from a friend. Five minutes may not be a lot, but it is worth its weight in gold when trying to cultivate and maintain a friendship. A simple text or Facebook message can go a long way, but I am finding that face time is key as well. I kind of even like it! (Work in progress…it could still be higher on the priority list known as my crazy schedule, but I’m getting there!)

Let me be clear though, I am not advocating for a friendship without boundaries that can just become high maintenance and produce a co-dependent relationship. I am talking about healthy relationships that are mutually beneficial, supportive and below surface level. And while it is good to be open and authentic, not everyone deserves the right to speak into your life unless they have earned it. Choose your friends wisely like a well-balanced diet. This is a special privilege that you decide, but just remember that it goes both ways. Make sure that they have your best interest at heart and not their own agenda. This is what separates friends and acquaintances.

So, FRIENDS…Who needs them? We all do...especially me. =D